Hello Facebook.
How are you. Fine I guess. Today I wanted to tell you what I really feel about you. A few years ago when I joined you, it was the time of Orkut here. I was like an immigrant who left orkut and joined you as a part of doing and having something new. Then my friends joined it too. You kept getting bigger and bigger. And now there you are with millions of people from all over the world. While a large number of people is enjoying your company, I wanted to tell you that you are actually a stupid, boring and annoying thing. I really wish I did not have to say that but this is true. I would like to express my feelings about you. I hope you like this letter, I have written it with a great care and love for you.
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10 Reasons Why Facebook Is Stupid, Boring and Annoying
Reason 1
Whenever I visit you, you give me a really warm welcome. So warm that gets me hot from my head to toe! Why? Because you are dumb and always welcome me with your never ending list of "People You May Know". How the hell you gonna know whom I know and whom I don't. Get the hell out of my way. "Perez, add more friends". "Perez, here are some people you may know" Get the hell out of my way I said!
Now one problem with us, the humans is that we don't like to be told of something again and again. There may be many times in everyone's life that they have told someone not to keep repeating something before them. Am I wrong? No I am not. We don't like to be reminded again and again. When someone keeps repeating it, you surely going to yell "I fucking know it, don't keep telling me that". Don't believe it? Come on, don't lie, I know you do.
But you are really stupid not to understand this real simple psychology. You keep annoying me again and again. If I click that so little close button, it will not show that person for a while but when I come back the other day, that person is right in front of me in the list of people you may know. And how many time am I supposed to be clicking that close button? The list never ever ends. You keep scrolling and it keeps getting larger and larger! Now how am I going to deal with that?
Reason 2
When I "like" something, it keeps giving me updates. For example, if I like some band on facebook, it will keep showing their recent updates. I know how this thing works but it doesn't mean when I "like" something, I want to receive their not-so-important updates. I like the band, I like the product, but I just "like" it. I like so many things, so many people, but you have changed the way of "liking". Liking means I "like" it, the general meaning of like, you get it dumbo? When I say I want to receive updates from that product or person, then, only then show me their updates okay?
The solution to this will be to click that "unlike" button. But I like that. I don't want to unlike it. I want to show everyone what I like. I just don't want their updates okay? Argh! You are really tough to make it understand.
Reason 3
You prevent me from sending friend requests. This is what it proves once again that you are dumb. You keep showing me that never ending list of people I may know. You don't know the hell about me do you? You just think that the friend of my friend is my friend too. Don't you? (You even show me people who are not even friends of my friends, they are just random people you show me) Now sometimes when I think I should add someone from that list, and the person does not confirm me as friend, you block me from sending friend requests. It was YOU who "suggested" me those friends. And now when I sent requests to them, they don't know me, so they don't confirm my friend request (obviously), you take me as someone who is bullying or harassing or spamming people and prevent me from sending other friend requests. And you know what, you don't even tell me that I am blocked from sending friends requests unless I try to send one. Brilliant!
Now if you think I should send friend requests to only those whom I "personally know" then why the hell you keep suggesting me friends? I will find them if I want them. Either stop showing me people I may know, or stop blocking me from sending friend requests. Simple enough dumbo!
Reason 4
You don't allow me to choose my own name. I am not free to have my name my way. You try to act as a big daddy on all of your members don't you? I must have my "real" name if I want to join facebook. You have a large list of possible names and no one can choose any other name out of it? Now why the hell you don't understand that I should be free to choose what name I want to show to the other members. Its my goddamn account and I do hell with it. Why would you act at a Government department where I must fill my real name in those forms? I am not applying for Government grants or something.
Reason 5
You have always problems with privacy. You try to act as the biggest platform when people from all over the world join together and create a "social network" and you have apparently succeeded. But you still don't pay attention to my privacy. I always need to change my not-so-effective privacy settings. They are not even easy to understand and implement. A lot of your members don't seem to care about this. They don't care about their privacy being violated time to time but I really love my privacy. But you always fail to protect it. I can't easily change my privacy in a way that certain people can see my update and some should not see it. You allow me to change this settings but when I have a lot lot friends its hard to keep adding and removing people from that settings. I want to allow a certain amount of people to see just photos of me and some people must see my recent updates. Can you allow me to do so?
Reason 6
I really don't like when people add tags of me in their photos. Even if that is me in the photo, I don't like to be tagged. As I told you before, I love my privacy. I don't want anyone to add tags of me even with my knowledge. But you don't give me that freedom. I can just choose if the tag of me apperas in my profile or not but the tag is still there. Why?
Reason 7
This is the same reason as above. You allow people to add someone as their family member, and when someone adds me as a family member, you ask me to confirm it. Good, but I don't want to be shown as a family member to anyone, so I reject it. But even after rejecting the request, my name is still shown in their list of family members. There is not link on my name in that list, but still my name is there. I don't want it bro. If I reject someone's request of adding me as a family member, then I should not be there at all. Do you get it?
Reason 8
You are a piece of boredom. People join you, add friends, post their photos, people "like" them, people comment on them "Hey you look awesome!", "Wow, that little puppy is really cute, what's his name?", "Hey where did you get that handbag from? Its great. I want one" and blah blah blah. That is it? I mean really that is it? That's what you can do? What else? Create groups? Make people join them, chatting, games and that's all? I mean what is there which will increase my knowledge? You will say you can't expect a "social networking site" to increase your knowledge. But I don't think so. When I'm on Twitter, I come to know what is going around the world just by looking at those trend items. People share their happiness, people show their griefs on Twitter. People even argue and fight on Twitter! Those 140 characters are worth a million words. And I don't even need those "likes" to know how many people agree with me. It is not always about liking and commenting on peoples' stuff. And you know what, even when people posted that "Steve Jobs is dead", people "liked" it. Ironic! What does that mean man!
Reason 9
You keep spying on me. Don't show me that fake "surprised look" okay? I hear people saying you keep track of my whereabouts even after I log out from you. They are wrong? Then prove it! Also, every time I change my name, email, contact number, you keep track of it. Even if I remove my old email or contact numbers from my profile, you still keep them in your database. Don't try to pretend you don't know anything. We both know you do. If I searched for someone, you even keep track of it. So when I try to search similar name again, you show me that previously searched name first. Prove me wrong if you want. I have a strong feeling of you working as an "agent". You keep eating peoples' information. You feed this information to Governments too? I have a feeling you do.
Reason 10
You don't allow me to block Mark Zuckerberg. You will ask why the hell I would want to block Mark Zuckerberg. My answer will be - I just want to do it. Reason may be any or no reason at all but I want to do it. That's it. It should not be you who will decide whom I should block and whom I should not. Its my account and why the hell I should not be free to choose whom to block? It doesn't matter to me if he's the founder of you and I don't really care. And you even lie saying "Blocking system is overload" Dumbo!!
Okay then facebook, this is it. I said what I wanted to say. I hope you don't mind what I said. If you paid attention to any of these reasons, consider thinking about them okay?
Until next time,
Bye.
Tip : Want to delete your Facebook account permanently? Click here for step by step tutorial on How to Delete your Facebook Account Permanently.
Okay people this was my letter to our dear Facebook. I tried to express my feelings which were crawling inside me since long. Today was the day when they actually could come out. To all those facebook lovers - Don't come crying here telling me what I said is wrong. "Facebook? Did you just say facebook? Facebook is stupid? who said that ha? How dare you call facebook stupid and boring. I use it everyday, I don't think so! Why the hell someone call facebook annoying?" I don't want to read any of these, really. You need to calm down dude! I tell you what I think. If you don't think so, then leave it that way, but I really think facebook is Stupid plus Boring plus Annoying. I've got my reasons for it. You've read them. If you didn't, then read. If you don't want to, then leave. And of course you are free to comment what you feel but just don't get hyper on me.
